Tag Archives: life

Premenopausal, Midlife crisis or Anxiety?

I’m not sure which is the real culprit or if all three are ganging up on me.

Lately, for the past how many months, my irritability level seemed to have skyrocketed. My body feels always tired not unless I get to exercise for the day. But if I don’t, I feel very lethargic. My motivation and interest levels seem blah. There are times I have many things on my mind I target to do but end up too tired to do it. 😦

Stress? Lack of sleep? Lack of fulfillment? Makes me think if these are adding to it as well. So question now is how do I get out if this rut?


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Filed under Anxiety and Depression, Health & Living, Me, Myself and I

Kiteboard Day Trip

Great day to kiteboard! Went for a day trip despite being a long weekend since the kids didn’t want to come. But almost 7hours of travel (total) just to kiteboard for 4hours was all worth it. We felt ecstatic to have learned to do carving transition today.

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Filed under Daily Gratitude, Health & Living, Kiteboarding, Let's Have Fun!, Sports & Recreation

Daily Gratitude

I have been feeling very stressed since the holidays to the point of getting anxiety attacks, which I have to immediately counter with medications so I don’t feel worse.

Exhaustion. Burnt-out. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually.

I know there have been many blessings these past months despite whatever humps I’ve run into. My exhaustion and anxiety, soaring to another level, blind me from appreciating all the recent blessings.

It is so difficult to think and stay positive while you are dealing with anxiety. When all these “what-if” thoughts take control and it takes so much mental effort to fight it down. Of course, the medicine helps to calm those raging and unreasonable anxiousness.

Medications. Another challenge. I have been wanting to reduce taking medications and learning to deal with it through more natural means, but the past weeks have not been good and I needed to. Otherwise, I’d probably be this very irritable and anxious monster.

I know I still have a lot to be thankful for, despite this rollercoaster struggle with anxiety. I am still thankful it is manageable. I am thankful I am sensitive to my body and can feel when an attack seems coming. I am thankful I can still find strength (especially mentally) to fight it. I just wish I can learn more ways to help myself.

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Filed under Anxiety and Depression, Daily Gratitude, Health & Living, Human Psychology, Me, Myself and I, Uncategorized


October was a rough month for me, though I guess I should also say it was a great month… for improvements and good things came out of the challenges that happened last month. There are a lot of questions, what ifs and still some lingering hurts, but it’s better to focus on the all positive changes that has happened.

As much as I had a lot to write about the past weeks, I didn’t feel like blogging about all the negative stuff and the trials. I guess it was too difficult to put them to writing.

Though I wonder if it would have helped more to ease the hurts to release them into words…


Filed under Me, Myself and I

The Secret To Moving On…

…is to travel light!


Filed under Health & Living

Hunger Reality: Are You Not Guilty?

I was recently blog hopping and came across this post from Blogusvox. I was so moved by the video and the tragic reality it showed. We all know that this is happening and it is so easy to think and acknowledge it then forget it amidst our busy lives, so to see it captured on video like this… I just can’t find the right words especially looking at that smiling happy face of a little girl eating leftover food that was already thrown away in the garbage…

So I’d like to share this video as well…here’s the link.

It’s a very apt video to share these days… after all everyone is buzzing and complaining about our President’s lavish meals.

Yet while we go on cursing and castigating our President, have we taken a good look at ourselves? It doesn’t have to be the same proportion as to what our President spent, but are we not guilty as well of being wasteful at times — it may be on food, clothes, miscellaneous stuff for the house, personal fetishes, gimmiks, etcetera… considering the situation of many poor families in our society.

I know I am.  Despite trying hard to practice, and to teach our kids as well, to be frugal and prudent, there are moments of weakness when we forget and spend irresponsibly. We may think that we are affecting and being irresponsible only to our own families, but as a priest and social worker once said, “spending unwisely and extravagantly is also being morally and socially irresponsible with so many suffering from poverty and hunger all over the world”.

I am not proud to admit it, but one thing that also turns me off are those who easily criticize others without realizing that they themselves are acting irresponsibly and have not taken any actions to help our country. That one I try my best to avoid.

This is not to say that we should all go starving ourselves as well to show our sympathy. It’s just to say that before we put the blame on people and organizations, let’s closely examine ourselves first.


Just something I’d like to share…

One thing I learned and am proud of about hubby is his generosity.  Many years back during the early years of our relationship, we were about to enter a fastfood restaurant when two or three street children blocked our way begging for alms. Instead of shooing them away or simply giving them coins, he invited them in, sat them on a table and ordered food for them.

I was so touched, my heart was bursting and I wanted to cry but kept the tears to myself, and smiled instead. I have not actually seen or met anyone brave enough to do this.

I say “brave” because many of us are cowards to show a different kind of generosity in public places, and risk the stare and opinions of others.  We would rather just give money and walk away.

It was the first time I saw him do that, but definitely not the last. To this day, there are still random moments when he does that.  And to this day, it has been our practice to give food instead of giving money to street kids begging for alms. At least with food, you know where it goes.

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Filed under Life in the World Around Us

Fight FOCA and RHB.

I received an email regarding this petition against the Freedom of Choice Act (FOCA) which gives a link to this site where US residents can give support to the petition.

Although this site seeks support from US residents, it was actually so tempting to sign and use a bogus address or an address of a family/relative who lives there. Instead I just decided to forward the message hoping that contacts in the US would support it, and for non-residents to spread the word.

I am strongly against abortion. It is sad how politicians come up with legislative bills that destroy life and not protect it, and encourages sex through contraceptive mentality.

In our local setting, we have our Catholic Church and different civic groups fighting against the Reproductive Health Bill (RHB). Although this bill does not include legalization of abortion (yet?) and claims to be “pro-quality life, enhances family life, does not promote contraceptive mentality, etcetera, etcetara”, it is very much worth scrutinizing before votes are cast or decisions made. These legal stuff are usually written in so many words that circle or loop around rather than go straight to the point.

I believe most common people have actually no idea what the bill exactly contains. Although there are online sites that post the bill (hopefully it is accurate), many probably have not bothered to read it. We are left to decide based on media articles, church-sponsored forums, organization discussions, etcetera. It is such a debatable issue, that people I know have such diverse opinions about it.

But speaking for myself, there are a number of items in the bill that I am not in favor of.  For one, I specifically don’t want my children to be taught sex education at the age of 10 (or in grade 5) by someone who will just be talking about it on a technical perspective without regard for the proper moral values about the topic of sex. Nor do I want contraceptives to be rampantly available and treated like over-the-counter medicines that makes pregnancy sound like a sickness. I still support natural birth control methods. And there are still more but I might not finish rambling.

For me, the solutions proposed are “easy-way-out” steps that our politicians want to implement without realizing how it can deeply destroy our society’s morality.

If you would like to proactively take a stand and support the Anti-RHB, you can go to the ff. URL to sign the petition:


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Filed under Health & Living, Parenting & Kids, Spirituality